Please click here call it: setting the mood :-)
As a woman, wife, mother and daughter who is just about "middle-aged" (yes, dammit I said it) it has been a stressful time all round.
I have teenagers who can flit from horrid potty-mouthed monsters; to loopy - totally nuts and bolts; to sweet angels; all in a matter of seconds. Combine ageing parents who are slowly becoming less able. Then top that off with a husband who, like myself, is coming to terms with being the Sandwich Generation and a wife that has her first career job (since giving birth 13years ago) and you have the hot, hot mess that is my everyday life.
The "sandwich generation" is a wonderful term for the time in your life where you are responsible for both the generation that you have spawned (in my case, teenage girls) and the older generation - that spawned you (self-explanatory). If you are nodding your head then this means you are banging around on the same boat. I know and I understand where you are.
I have teenagers who can flit from horrid potty-mouthed monsters; to loopy - totally nuts and bolts; to sweet angels; all in a matter of seconds. Combine ageing parents who are slowly becoming less able. Then top that off with a husband who, like myself, is coming to terms with being the Sandwich Generation and a wife that has her first career job (since giving birth 13years ago) and you have the hot, hot mess that is my everyday life.
The "sandwich generation" is a wonderful term for the time in your life where you are responsible for both the generation that you have spawned (in my case, teenage girls) and the older generation - that spawned you (self-explanatory). If you are nodding your head then this means you are banging around on the same boat. I know and I understand where you are.
I find that I am more able to switch off to my girls because I know that their raging hormones have eradicated rational thought and action processes and I know that things will get better. Eventually... All the books say so! Really! And... in all honesty they are no that bad - if only they would keep their rooms tidy and help a bit more in the house (where have I heard that before?).
Not so easy with our older folk. It is really difficult coming to terms with parents - who have always seemed so immortal and mighty - becoming anything less. Until recently ageing was a romantic notion that was only reflected in the eyes of our great-grandparents and then our grandparents, who were always "so old", it seemed normal. It does not feel the same when your own parents - who you always used to go to for help - are now coming to you.
Having said that, I love and appreciate both sides of my sandwich, they are both wonderful in their own ways - but sometimes it is hard being the meat!
Moving on to my next issue:
Why is it that I, as a wife and mother, cannot shake the guilt or feel attacked every time my work etches into my family time. Men don't seem to share this affliction, its work and its gotta be done. So why do I feel guilty? I have taken a back seat for most of my life, I worked within school hours for 11 years, doing a job that would not really challenge me or advance my career, never once regretting my choice. So why is it that now I feel guilty for every work function? Yes, granted, at this time of year there have been a lot!
But I still don't really get it...
I have accepted my husband's work and even sport commitments that have taken him away from "Family Time". I don't really recall ever being sulky about it, so why am I faced with sulking about my work commitments?
I have been working at and planning for this conference since May and finally, by Wednesday next week it will all be over! My reward is being at all the dinners and attending the trip to Waiheke Island - which is nice, but I still feel guilty about the personal time that it eats into.
Ho hum... First World problems!
Next:
So Christmas is swiftly approaching and I am proud to say that I have managed to keep my blog up for almost 2 years, with a post every month - not too bad. I have also written a short story which I have self-published as an Ebook and have started on a novel (although I have had writers block for about 4 months). Still I am quite pleased with what I have managed, my next blog will most likly be about new goals. Have a great Christmas Everyone!
Moving on to my next issue:
Why is it that I, as a wife and mother, cannot shake the guilt or feel attacked every time my work etches into my family time. Men don't seem to share this affliction, its work and its gotta be done. So why do I feel guilty? I have taken a back seat for most of my life, I worked within school hours for 11 years, doing a job that would not really challenge me or advance my career, never once regretting my choice. So why is it that now I feel guilty for every work function? Yes, granted, at this time of year there have been a lot!
But I still don't really get it...
I have accepted my husband's work and even sport commitments that have taken him away from "Family Time". I don't really recall ever being sulky about it, so why am I faced with sulking about my work commitments?
I have been working at and planning for this conference since May and finally, by Wednesday next week it will all be over! My reward is being at all the dinners and attending the trip to Waiheke Island - which is nice, but I still feel guilty about the personal time that it eats into.
Ho hum... First World problems!
Next:
So Christmas is swiftly approaching and I am proud to say that I have managed to keep my blog up for almost 2 years, with a post every month - not too bad. I have also written a short story which I have self-published as an Ebook and have started on a novel (although I have had writers block for about 4 months). Still I am quite pleased with what I have managed, my next blog will most likly be about new goals. Have a great Christmas Everyone!
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